95,910 notes

suckmyvertical:

clothes should not be considered on sale if they’re still more than $20

(via eloquentsummers)

311,842 notes
47,005 notes
Cake Boss in a nutshell…

barebackbearyak:

Customer: I want a nice chocolate cake for my young son, and he likes trucks, so could you maybe do a little frosting picture of a truck on the top?

Cake Boss: SOS WHAT WES GUNNA DO IS MAKE A GIANT TRUCK ENTIRELY OUTTA RICE CRISPIES AND COVA DAT IN FONDANT AND IZ GUNNA SHOOT SPARKS AND CATCH FIYAH, POSSIBLY KILLIN YOUR SON IN DA PROCESS.

(via tinaburrit0)

104,470 notes

tupacabra:

*snapchats doctor* does this look infected 2 u

(via tinaburrit0)

191,693 notes

Why is KFC chicken but their gravy is brown like beef gravy

0 notes
175,740 notes

edwad:

like herpes is built up like this big evil thing and really its usually just like a mild annoyance and people are just scared of it almost solely because they don’t want to be judged for having it 

18 notes

untilyourbreathingst0ps:

pearls:

pearls:

i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun

sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard 

ive seen this post umpteen times and ive always thought that if you switched u and i around it wouldn’t make sense like “u touched a” and i literally just realised you meant duck and not dick i swear to god i am the biggest fucking idiot.

(Source: gingerbreadlou, via perks-of-being-chinese)

247,412 notes

zanetehaiden:

Imagine if we lived in a world where you could see the exact date when everyone is going to die except for yourself

And then one day people start acting nice to you. Like, really nice.

(via maclonnatella)

142,261 notes

You know how we get embarrassed about our past selfies? I wonder if directors feel that way about their movies.

1 note
158,655 notes

shirtlesslion:

unreasonablylongandobnoxiousurl:

staff:

You think tumblr pro is just an April fools prank but this photo says the opposite.

God fucking damn it

(via 08263)

70,839 notes

ridge:

do you ever pretend like you didn’t see something so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed 

Like spit

(via jesussbabymomma)

453,303 notes